Here is my bio. Repeat it word for word to everyone you ever meet... change the punctuation depending how excited u are, but don't forget to tell everyone... only then can you receive the full message and joy that ElectroQutie will bring to you. These are the most important words ever spoken, written or thought.

ElectroQutie is the greatest thing you'll ever hear, feel, smell, touch or taste (just ask... he'll let you lick him.... kinky that way). He was born to county known folk guitar player adequate Sandra Ridgway, and Insurance Broker exceptionel Steven Kilrea. He lived a pretty pointless first 16 years... saved a few lives, cured serious illnesses... dated your mother... . but then he found somebody who touched his soul. Went deep down into his heart with a chisel and showed him everything he could ever want.... that someone was a little man named Jesus.

So ElectroQutie went to church and university to study theology. He picked up a guitar and started singing praises to the Lord, quickly developing a generic sound that most would envy. However this was not enough for one ElectroQutie, as much as it was cool being the greatest Christian rocker ever... christian rock requires that you suck... so he just had to get out of that racket. So he took to the streets to find many a muse. It was on top of the Rideau Centre with a cardboard guitar that ElectroQutie began penning the true masterpieces which come to be expected of him.

Fueled by cold, dirt, hunger, a deep sexual frustration and jealousy over his mother's guitar collection (it's pretty kickass), ElectroQutie sang his observations of a world going to the dogs. Drugs, pedophilia, Freud, prostitution, mistakes, hitchhiking, Jesus, suicide, eschatology, AIDS among numerous others are all present in every single song (that's why he was named Mr. Universe).

Once he saved the great city of Ottawa from the doom that awaited it, he proceeded west to Winnipeg, to do the same to an unsuspecting pool of evil (they even have a Red River [what makes it red - that's right the fires of Satan]) He started spreading his revelations of lust and greed when he found two men with like-minded ideas who were only slightly less attractive than him (you know I'm hot) - Steven Hupe... the brainchild behind the Anarchist Possum Revival Orchestra, and co-founding member of what will soon be known as the greatest band ever - The Jonestown Escapists... and Werner Harder who remains his conspiracy theorist every evening (in bed lol, jk, rotflmao, omg, gtg, ttyl, brb).

Back. The End. Spread this message or perish.

Love and Respect.

Media inquiries:

www.myspace.com/electroqutie

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